I love it when people have "who would win in a fight" conversations. You know the kind - "Who would win in a fight between Robocop and the Terminator?" or "Who would win a fight between Peewee Herman and Gilligan?" Etc...

But something that is always laking in those conversations is a proper, quantifiable, measurement of how much of a "bad-ass" someone or something is.

Toward that end - here is my B.A.Q. (Bad Ass Quotient) System:

Fire Ant -------------------------------------------------- BAQ = 1
Sewer Rat ----------------------------------------------- BAQ = 10
Chihuahua ----------------------------------------------- BAQ = 100
Drunk Redneck (armed with a pool cue) ----- BAQ = 1,000
Green Beret (armed with a machete) ---------- BAQ = 10,000
Silverback Gorilla ------------------------------------- BAQ = 100,000
Black Rhino -------------------------------------------- BAQ = 1,000,000
Tyrannosaurus Rex ---------------------------------- BAQ = 10,000,000

It would take about 10 fire ants to evenly fight 1 sewer rat.
It would take about 10 sewer rats to evenly fight 1 Chihuahua.
It would take about 10 Chihuahuas to evenly fight 1 drunk redneck armed with a pool cue.
Etc...

Now we have a scale on which we can use to measure the "Bad-Assness" of almost anyone or anything!

Here are some examples:


Butterfly
 (posters-pics-info) ====================================================== 0 BAQ
Honey Bee (pics-info-website) ==================================================== 1 BAQ
Fire Ant (pics-info-website-video) ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- 1 BAQ
Wasp (pics-info-website)
 ========================================================= 3 BAQ
Hermit Crab (posters-pics-info-website-video) ========================================= 4 BAQ
Smurf (pics-info-video-website) ==================================================== 6 BAQ
Gerbil (pics-info-video) ========================================================== 6 BAQ
Sewer Rat  (posters-pics-info-video) ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ 10 BAQ
Tarantula  (posters-pics-info-video) ================================================ 12 BAQ
Rabbit (posters- pics-info-video) =================================================== 35 BAQ
Vampire Bat  (posters-pics-info-website) ============================================ 49 BAQ
Rooster (unarmed) (posters-pics -info -video) ========================================== 79 BAQ
Squirrel  (posters-pics -info -video) ================================================== 81 BAQ
House Cat  (posters-pics -info -video1-video2) ========================================== 88 BAQ
Lobster  (posters-pics -info -video -forum) ============================================== 90 BAQ
Chihuahua  (posters-pics -info -video) ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- 100 BAQ
Care Bear  (posters-pics-info-website-video) ========================================== 110 BAQ
Rooster (armed with cock-fighting spurs) ( posters -pics -info -video) ========================== 112 BAQ
Three Year Old Girl  (posters-pics -info ) ============================================ 115 BAQ
Kermit the Frog  (posters-pics -info -video) =========================================== 167 BAQ
Goose  (posters-pics-info-video) =================================================== 205 BAQ
Opossum  (posters-pics -info -video) ================================================= 287 BAQ
Raccoon  (posters-pics-info-video) ================================================== 289 BAQ
Barney the Dinosaur  ( pics - info - video - news ) ======================================== 209 BAQ
Munchkin - from the movie "Wizard of Oz" (posters-pics -info -video)  ========================== 289 BAQ
Gilligan  (posters-pics -info -video) =================================================== 306 BAQ
Oompa Loompa - from "Charlie and the Chocolate Factory" (posters-pics -info -video) ============= 308 BAQ
Triumph - the insult comic dog (pics-info-video1-video2-audio) ============================== 311 BAQ
Badger
(posters-pics -info -video) =================================================== 361 BAQ
Mahatma Gandhi  (posters-pics-info) =============================================== 409 BAQ
Helen Keller   ( posters-pics-info) =================================================== 410 BAQ
Cookie Monster (posters-pics -info -video) ============================================ 410 BAQ
Mr. Noodle  (pics-info) ========================================================== 411 BAQ
Stuart Smalley (pics-info-video) =================================================== 412 BAQ
Skunk  (posters-pics-info-video) ===================================================== 417 BAQ
Mr. Bean (pics-info-video1-video2) =================================================== 418 BAQ
Steve Urkel (pics-info-video) ====================================================== 420 BAQ
Barn Owl (posters-pics -info -video) =================================================== 421 BAQ
Peewee Herman (posters-pics -info -video) ============================================= 422 BAQ
C-3PO - from "Star Wars" - (posters-pics -info -video)  ======================================= 449 BAQ
Stephanie  - from "Lazy Town" (pics-info-website-video1-video2) ============================== 498 BAQ
Bogeyman (pics-info-website-video) ================================================== 500 BAQ
Crack Whore
(posters-pics -info -video) ================================================ 550 BAQ
Paris Hilton (posters-pics-info-video) ================================================= 565 BAQ

Donkey  - from the movie "Shrek" (posters-pics-info-video) ================================== 746 BAQ
Zombie
(posters-pics -info -video1-video2) =============================================== 749 BAQ
Average Human (pics -info -video) =================================================== 755 BAQ
Dr. Evil - from Austen Powers movies (unarmed) (posters-pics -info -video) ======================= 804 BAQ
Britney Spears  (posters-pics-info-video) ============================================== 815 BAQ
Booger - from "Revenge of the Nerds" (posters-pics -info -video) =============================== 817 BAQ
Weird Al Yankovic (pics-info-video1-video2-video3) ====================================== 818 BAQ
Cindy Crawford (posters-pics-info-video) ============================================= 820 BAQ
Danica Patrick   ( posters-pics-info-website-video) ======================================== 833 BAQ
Whoopi Goldberg (posters-pics -info -video) =========================================== 835 BAQ
Howard Stern (posters-pics -info -video) =============================================== 862 BAQ
Gollum  - from "Lord of the Rings" (unarmed and without ring) (posters-pics-info-website-video) ======== 865 BAQ
Hawkeye Pierce - from "M.A.S.H." (posters-pics -info -video) =============================== 866 BAQ
Rush Limbaugh (pics -info -video) =================================================== 998 BAQ
Drunk Redneck (armed with a pool cue) (posters-pics -info -video) ----------------------------------------------------- 1,000 BAQ
Robbie Rotten  - from "Lazy Town" (pics-info-website-video) =============================== 1,035 BAQ
Gallagher   (armed with " Sledge-O-Matic " ) (pics-info-website) ============================== 1,076 BAQ
Sacagawea  (pics-info) ========================================================== 1,088 BAQ
Sarah Silverman
(pics-info-website-video1-video2-video3-video4-video5-audio) ================== 1,091 BAQ
Osama Bin Laden   (unarmed ) (posters-pics-info-website-video) ============================= 1,105 BAQ
George W. Bush (posters-pics -info -video) ============================================ 1,105 BAQ
Tommy Hilfiger (pics-info-website-video) ============================================= 1,106 BAQ
Bodhidharma  (posters-pics-info) =================================================== 1,112 BAQ
Willy Wonka (armed with cane) (posters-pics -info -video) =================================== 1,117 BAQ
Stupid Guy   (armed with sledge hammer and an arisole can ) (pics-info-video-forum) ================ 1,123 BAQ
P!nk  (posters-pics-info-website-video) ================================================= 1,140 BAQ
Al Franken (pics-info-website-video1-video2-audio) ======================================= 1,155 BAQ
Conan O'Brien (posters-pics -info -video) ============================================== 1,165 BAQ
Forrest Gump (unarmed ) (posters-pics-info-website-video) ================================= 1,197 BAQ
Cho Seung-Hui  (unarmed) (pics-info-video) =========================================== 1,241 BAQ
Ferris Bueller - from "Ferris Bueller's Day Off" (pics -info -video-website) ======================= 1,290 BAQ
Jeffrey Dahmer (pics -info -video) ================================================== 1,301 BAQ
Norman Borlaug  (posters-pics-info-website-video) ===================================== 1,324 BAQ
Tiger Woods (armed with golf club) (posters-pics -info -video) ============================== 1,439 BAQ
Raymond Teller  - of "Penn & Teller" (pics-info-website-video1-video2) ====================== 1,440 BAQ
Chris Rock  (posters-pics-info-video1-video2-audio) ==================================== 1,491 BAQ
Jack Sparrow
- from "Pirates of the Caribbean" (unarmed) (posters-pics -info -video) ============= 1,685 BAQ
Gremlin - from the movie "Gremlins" (posters-pics -info -video) ============================= 1,696 BAQ
Axl Rose (posters-pics-info-video) ================================================ 1,702 BAQ
Sherlock Holmes  (posters-pics-info-website-video) =================================== 1,764 BAQ
John Ritter   (pics-info-website-video-audio) ========================================== 1,789 BAQ
Steve McQueen  (posters-pics-info-video) ========================================== 1,878 BAQ
Napoléon Bonaparte  (unarmed) (posters-pics-info) =================================== 1,899 BAQ
Stalin
(posters-pics -info -video) ==================================================== 1,985 BAQ
Pimp (posters-pics -info -video) ===================================================== 1,990 BAQ
Princess Leia (unarmed) (posters-pics-info-video) ====================================== 2,030 BAQ
MacGyver  (pics-info-video) ====================================================== 2,145 BAQ
Wolf (posters-pics -info -video) ===================================================== 2,144 BAQ
Boa Constrictor (posters-pics -info -video) =========================================== 2,312 BAQ
Chimp (posters-pics -info -video) =================================================== 2,499 BAQ
Charlie Chaplin  (posters-pics-info-video1-video2) ===================================== 2,585 BAQ
Eskimo Fisherman (armed with spear) (posters-pics -video)  ============================= 2,590 BAQ
Adolf Hitler (pics -info -video) ==================================================== 2,665 BAQ
Abraham Lincoln (posters-pics -info -video) ========================================== 2,810 BAQ
King Cobra (posters-pics -info -video) =============================================== 2,964 BAQ
Trevor Goodchild  (unarmed) (pics-info-video) ======================================= 3,046 BAQ
Julius Caesar  (unarmed) (posters-pics-info) ========================================= 3,081 BAQ
Penn Jillette  - of "Penn & Teller" (pics-info-website-video1-video2-audio1-audio2) =============== 3,083 BAQ
OJ Simpson
(armed with glove and knife) (pics -info -video)  ================================ 3,100 BAQ
Kathryn Janeway  - from "Star Trek" (pics-info-video) ===================================3,126  BAQ
Virgil Tibbs
- from "In the Heat of the Night" (pics -info -video) ============================== 3,148 BAQ
Wolverine - the animal (posters-pics -info -video) ======================================= 3,345 BAQ
Tony Montana - from "Scarface" (unarmed) ( posters-pics -info -video)  ======================== 3,507 BAQ
Steve Irwin  - from "The Crocodile Hunter" (posters-pics-info-website-video) =================== 3,551 BAQ
Jonathan Archer  - from "Star Trek" (pics-info-video) ===================================  3,750 BAQ
R2-D2 - from "Star Wars" (posters -pics -info -video) ====================================== 3,965 BAQ
Matador (armed with red cape and lance) (posters -pics -info -video)  ========================== 3,989 BAQ
Harry Calahan - from "Dirty Harry" (unarmed) ( posters - pics - info - video ) ====================== 4,010 BAQ
James T. Kirk  - from "Star Trek" (posters-pics-info-video) ===============================  4,059 BAQ
Han Solo   (unarmed ) (posters-pics-info-video1-video2) =================================== 4,103 BAQ
Jean-Luc Picard
 - from "Star Trek" (posters-pics-info-video) =============================  4,177 BAQ
Aladdin  - from the movie "Aladdin" (posters-pics-info-video) =============================== 4,330 BAQ
Green Beret (unarmed) (posters-pics -info